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Heart hurts…

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You know how sometimes you can tell when a person’s heart just isn’t there anymore?  You can tell they have given up the fight. You can tell their feelings have changed.  You feel the emptiness in the space they used to occupy.  I used to feel his love for me and the warmth it provided.  Now I feel the cold left in the place he used to occupy. 

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21 thoughts on “Heart hurts…

  1. You know I’m thinking of you… I’ve had to privatize my blog – his wife is aware of it & mean streak & a desire for vengeance aside, I don’t really think that she needs to read it… I’m trying to figure out the best way to do this so that no one except the people I want to can follow me… I’ll send you an invite if I can’t figure out another way to do this…

    • I agree. Definitely not a good idea for her to read. It would only make things harder for both of you and him as well. I wonder how she found out. Somebody must have told her.

      Yes, please send me an invite. I know we just met in the “blog-o-sphere” but I would hate to lose touch with you. It has been nice to read your stories and have someone to discuss this with.

      I’m thinking of you too.

      • Hey! I was trying to post a comment on your latest post. It wont’t let me. So, I hope you get this one.

        Just wanted to say I think you are doing the right thing by hearing him out. I try to make choices based on regret. You have already come this far with him, and if you didn’t hear him out I think you will regret not knowing what he had to say, more than you will regret talking. Be careful though and guard your “flicker” You’re a different woman than you were then. Remember that. Sending you warm thoughts and keep us posted!

      • Thanks a lot. That is a great perspective – I’ve been feeling as though I’m readying for battle; you’ve helped me remember to be a bit more openminded – no regrets is the mantra I’ve tried to follow through all of this – even before it blew up. Great reminder!

      • Yeah, I’m doing really well! There was so much drama on Friday over really, the same old same old; add that to the gross feeling of my blog being hacked, and I just finally have had enough & feel ready to move on. I’m aware that there will be good days & not as good days, but now that I’ve clawed my way out of the fog, I am hanging onto this good feeling with everything that I’ve got!! 🙂

      • That’s so awesome! I love that feeling when you finally get over the hump. I’m so happy for you. I just read your latest post. I wonder why he felt the need to tell you he wanted his family? You already knew that, right?

      • Oh yeah. I knew. I guess he felt guilty about how much we were still talking when she thought contact had been broken, and he wants “radio silence” but was worried I’d be hurt if he said that… I told him that nothing he could do would hurt more than what he did in November & I was fine with said “radio silence”… Which I totally am…

      • I can say without reservation that him not popping by, not checking in, all of that is the best thing that could’ve happened for me… I’ve known since before this blew up that the only way I could heal is if was as removed as he possibly could be from my life… That’s why I painted him into a corner by kicking him out of my social life… The only way I could heal was with him gone & he finally gave me that – though only when it was what he wanted, I should note!

      • Ugh. For all of him promising me & her that he’d leave me alone, the first thing this am he was back in my office, asking if I’d started a new blog, trying to extract promises of what I would & wouldn’t write about in it, saying what pics I could & could not use. Seriously… At least he’s making it easier for me to get sick of him! Told him what I thought of him trying to dictate this to me.

      • What?! Are you serious? I’m glad you let him know what you thought about that. He had more power when you were in the relationship with him. I don’t think he is liking his new position without power. 🙂 Good for you for standing your ground.

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